Behavior
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Ask Better Questions
Practical tips for managers and leaders who want to ask questions that build trust, spark honest dialogue, and improve team performance.
Dain Johnson
Dec 10, 2025
Effective leaders aren’t just good at giving answers, in fact, they’re often better at asking questions.
In my experience both in coaching and management, I’ve found that a well-timed question often creates more impact than any advice I could offer. Whether you’re facilitating strategy, helping someone navigate a challenge, or improving team performance, the right question can uncover insight and lead to better decisions.
Better questions -> Better conversations -> Better decisions.
Here are seven ways to ask better questions:
1. Start and end with curiosity.
Like a fake smile, people can detect fake questions. There is always more to a situation than what you know, and the only way to better understand it is to ask questions from a place of genuine curiosity.
Instead of: "Yeah, I know this exact situation. Here’s what you should do."
Try: "That reminds me of a situation I’ve been in, but I’m sure this is different. What’s unique about this one?"
2. Don’t hide opinions inside questions.
Avoid hiding your opinion inside a question. “Don’t you think it would be better if we…?” isn’t a question, it’s a veiled directive. This type of phrasing can shut down dialogue and leave people feeling manipulated.
If you have a point to make, just say it.
Instead of: “Don’t you think this approach will cause us to fail miserably?”
Try: “I have some concerns about the risks of this approach. Here are some that are coming to mind for me. What risks do you see?"
3. Don't punish the answers you don’t like.
When you ask a question, expect an answer. And if you want honesty, prove you can handle it. When someone shares something uncomfortable, don’t defend yourself or dismiss them. Thank them and let what they said land before responding.
People will only be as honest as it feels safe to be. Safety comes from how you respond, so no defensiveness, attacking, judging, or playing devil’s advocate.
You don’t have to agree, but you do have to listen.
4. Leading questions lead nowhere.
Leading questions are just a way of steering someone toward your own idea.
Instead of nudging people toward “your way,” ask open-ended questions that invite them to bring their way forward.
Instead of: “Don’t you think it’s time we try _____ to be more efficient?”
Try: “What we're doing isn't working. What do you suggest we try next?”
5. Ask "What else?" (and mean it).
If there’s one magic question to add to your toolkit, it’s this: "What else?”
It's distinctly different from “Anything else?” which signals you're ready to move on.
It's distinctly different from “Do you have anything else?” which invites a no.
"What else?" signals “I’m still listening. I think there’s more here, and I want to hear it.”
Use it after someone offers an idea, shares feedback, or opens up. It shows curiosity and encourages the conversation to continue until it's natural conclusion.
6. Ditch the performance questions. Invite authenticity.
Whether interviewing, coaching, or giving feedback, ask questions that invite real answers rather than rehearsed ones.
Here are examples of performative vs. authentic questions for a few different scenarios:
Interviewing
Performative: “What’s your biggest weakness?”
Authentic: "What kind of situations bring out the best in you?"
Performance Feedback
Performative: “Why didn’t you meet the deadline?”
Authentic: “What got in the way?”
Career Development
Performative: “What’s your long-term career goal?”
Authentic: “What’s something you’ve outgrown in your current role?”
Team Dynamics & Collaboration
Performative: “Do you like working with your team?”
Authentic: “Who do you feel you work best with, and why?”
7. Ask what you can do.
The best leaders don’t just give direction. They ask how they can be better partners.
So ask:
“What do you need from me right now?”
“What could I do to support you better?”
“What’s something I might not see that’s affecting your work?”
"What's something I do that you find helpful?"
Your Questions Reveal Your Intent
Every question you ask is a signal of what you value, what you’re paying attention to, and what kind of relationship people can expect with you.
Questions aren’t just for getting information out of someone. They’re also used for building relationships, creating alignment, and eliciting strategic thinking.
So, before you ask others, ask yourself:
Am I looking for a specific answer, or am I genuinely curious?
Quick Test: Is this a Good Question?
Ask yourself:
- Do I already know the answer I want?
- Am I making space for a different perspective?
- Does this question invite insight or compliance?